The Caffeine Junkie and Her Escapades
“Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this is the whole duty of man.” Ecc 12:13Archive for December, 2006
Episode 180: where I know I must be
“Home” must be one of the better national day songs, and every time I touch down in Changi that song always plays in my head. This is home, truly, where I know I must be, where my dreams wait for me… well, not quite.
My dreams did not wait for me. In fact, as self-absorbed as it sounds, most of my dreams died when I left Tullamarine. Cuz, there is not much dreaming left to be done. Life feels strangely un-expectant.
Normality isn’t even normal because something inherently has changed. Home is still home, but family is different. Friends are still friends, but the feeling of detachment can be overwhelming at times and the ghost of Simmel hangs in the balmy Sentosa air.
In the end, I am just “a triangle trying to squeeze through a circle/ She tried to cut me so I’d fit”. There is much emotional resonance to the chorus of this song ‘Scar‘ by Missy Higgins
And doesn’t that sound familiar? Doesn’t that hit too close to home?
Doesn’t that make you shiver; the way things could have gone?
And doesn’t it feel peculiar when everyone wants a little more?
And so that I do remember to never go that far,
Could you leave me with a scar?
and the picture of my favourite coffee place says the cliched X amount of words.
so I guess, this is home, truly, where I know I must be.
Episode 179: Good night, Good night! parting is such sweet sorrow…
that I shall say good night till it be morrow.
— ol’ Jules in R and J. 🙂
in the interim between my parents leaving and S coming tomorrow, I’ve been saying my goodbyes.
But first, a little about my parents’ visit. it was a great time! whee! i was so stoked about them coming and wasn’t disappointed, to say the least. thoroughly pampered by my mummy’s wonderful cooking in melbourne and brought them to all my favourite places. and growing up as my parents’ shadow (i never knew how to react when people called me that last time, i just smiled weakly and proceed to scowl at the commentator’s back), i figured they’d enjoy what I do. and they did! 🙂
ok maybe they were more fazed by the gays and lesbians on Brunswick then I had expected (how was I to predict they had much more homophobic inclinations then me?!) but it was good fun in Melbourne, seeing them gush at how pwetty melbuni is (and the architecture really is amazing!), and my mother taking the most hilarious picture with a graffiti (she’d kill if i posted it here) and my dad taking an avid interest in trying to hunting down many Indian dining places in Melb (seriously. he comes to an angmoh country and eats chicken tikka. and you ask me why I am dysfunctional?). we enjoyed the Great Ocean Road immensely, amazing how God created such wonderful stuffies and made us too, doncha think? and they loved Port Philip and St Kilda beach etcetcetc. 🙂
and adelaide was fun too. in a sleepy sorta way. only qualm I had was that the weather ranged in the 40s. now it is not that I have a bad understanding of the word ‘range’, ‘range’ is suppose to have an upper and lower limit, so how can i just say 40s? well yes, in the mad world that is aussieland, the range was not in terms of numbers, but in terms of physical units. it ranged from 40 deg faranheit to 45 deg centigrade. oh, and on a totally geek note, daddy found an error in one of the Museum’s exhibits in the way the converted their SI units (some pascal versus atmospheric pressure thingamajig). yowza!
they carried back 20kg worth of books, of which 15kg is mine. insanity is heriditary. miss them muchos already.
but I would be going back soon, in 10 days from now. hence the saying of goodbyes.
painful, you know? to have to write byebye notes. and to take pictures for the last time. with promises that we’ll meet again. laughing over the final cup of coffee. dreaming about the future, of marriages, kids, postgrads, and tattoos of dragonflies when we’re 90.
no more stuffing our faces silly with cupcakes, or taking silly group photos in really pretty mirrors, or popping by each other’s place, or eating cardboard-tasting vegan school-coop tofu burgers (eeeeugh!) whilst whiling the time away. Or going to free museum exhibits (and many other free things!). Or even trooping back to Melb central and complaining about rising transport costs (ok fine, we really shouldnt complain because international students, unlike aussie students or exchange students, pay full fare) and the blasted weather with flies kamikazing into our faces.
i didn’t expect to make much friends in such a short period of time. definitely didn’t in the same amount of time which was the gross-out-and-painful-first-semester-of-freshman-year. God really provided me with good friends here and they run the whole gamut. From the sheeshbimbo, to the anarchist, to the inner rebel, to the geog-geek currently hiking in macchu pichu, to the angry asian, to the lets-all-go-vegan veggie girl, to the mighty women of God, to the periodically insane housemates, to many whom most literally raise their glass to (also known as the ‘canwepleasegotothebottleshop’? naggers). to all these and more, i say, good on you, mates. 🙂
The Caffeine Junkie and Her Escapades 